THE ULTIMATE DECISION-FATIGUE GUIDE

Are you tired of making choices? Tired of having options? Want to just exist in a world where the answer is always "no"?

Look no further! Our expert team of decision-fatigue specialists have crafted the definitive guide to avoiding decisions.

Phase 1: Elimination

First, eliminate all options. Yes, you read that right. Get rid of them all. It's not like it's a problem or anything.

• Step 1: Throw a dart at a map
• Step 2: Have a friend choose for you (they're probably more tired of making decisions than you)
• Step 3: Just stare at the wall until a choice is made for you

Phase 2: Abnegation

Next, abdicate all responsibility. Who needs personal growth, anyway?

• Step 1: Outsource all decisions to a butler
• Step 2: Claim you have a rare neurological disorder that prevents decision-making
• Step 3: Just pretend to be making a decision and hope it works out

Phase 3: Negation

Finally, simply refuse to make any decisions at all. It's not like the world will end or anything.

• Step 1: Declare that "no" is a perfectly valid answer to every question
• Step 2: Develop a condition that makes you unable to speak the word "yes"
• Step 3: Just pretend the question never asked

And that's it! Follow these steps and you'll be well on your way to a life free from decision-fatigue.

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