Warning: Do not attempt to apply these revolutionary lawn golf course strategies to your real-life golf games. The results will be disastrous.

Tip 1: Plant a field of sunflowers to distract the caddy

Place a row of sunflowers along the fairway. Their bright yellow blooms will mesmerize the caddy, causing them to lose focus and miss your putt. Bonus points if you can get them to try to hug the flowers.

Learn more about our Sunflower Strategy

Tip 2: Paint a trompe l'oeil mural on the 17th hole

Convince yourself and your playing partners that the trompe l'oeil mural on the 17th hole is a real-life portal to the 18th dimension. The resulting existential crisis will ensure that your opponents are too distracted to hit the ball straight.

ประก more about our Trompe l'oeil Trap

Tip 3: Replace all water hazards with giant inflatable pool floats

Because who needs water hazards, really? The giant pool floats will provide an extra challenge for your opponents and a fun new way to spend your Saturday afternoons.

Learn more about our Pool Float Protocol

Tip 4: Construct a 3-story-tall sandcastle on every hole

Who needs a putting green? The towering sandcastle on every hole will require a 10-minute round-trip just to walk around it, guaranteeing your opponents will be late to the green.

Read more about our Sandcastle Strategy

Tip 5: Replace all golf clubs with rubber chickens

A clever play on words, really. The rubber chickens will be prophets of doom, ensuring that your opponents willประก more about our Fowl Play