A whirlpool of existential dread and ontological uncertainty
We're not really sure, but it's probably something with more free time and better Wi-Fi
Because, let's be real, the alternative is a never-ending cycle of meaningless existence and the crushing ennui of a toaster that's still not toasted
if (existence == meaningless)
then do {
// stare at wall, contemplate futility
} else {
// pretend to be interested in Netflix
}