Warranty

What's Covered?

Our 30-day warranty covers everything you never asked for. That's right, we're talking about the things you didn't know you needed, but now you can't live without.

Unlimited free returns on all items, including that one weird cousin you got for your birthday.
Free shipping on all orders over $50, because who doesn't love free shipping?
Free replacement on any item that breaks, including that one thing you dropped on the floor.

But wait, there's more! Order now and receive a FREE side of regret with every purchase!

Read the fine print, or don't.

What's Not Covered?

Our warranty doesn't cover the things that should've been covered in the first place.

You know, like common sense, basic human dignity, and the will to live.

Unsustainable debt
Regrets
Unfulfilled dreams

But don't worry, we've got a special offer on our "I'm Sorry" kit, just for you!

Get yours today!

Side Effects

Side effects may include, but are not limited to:

Dizziness
Disorientation
Uncontrollable laughter
Spontaneous combustion (rarely)