Objective: To be a better, more intelligent, and more attractive version of myself.
Skills: Extreme intelligence, unparalleled wit, and a penchant for fancy hats.
Goals: Dominate the world, solve all its problems, and make everyone love me.
Experience: Too much, but not enough.
Interests: Reading, writing, and making everyone else feel inferior.
Education: The University of Life, where I earned a degree in being the smartest person in the room.
References: Available upon request, but be warned, they're all terrified of me.
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