We regret to inform you that our service was not as swift as expected. Our highly trained staff was delayed due to a series of unfortunate events, including:

• Uncooperative coffee machine

• Spontaneous dance party in the break room

• Unresolved disputes between coworkers over whose turn it was to use the stapler

We apologize for the inconvenience this has caused and will make sure to get our act together for next time. In the meantime, we recommend taking a deep breath and trying our adjacent services for an expedited experience.