Pre-Collapse Preparation Protocols

Phase 1: Panic Not Included

Step 1: Stock up on Emergency Cheese

It's essential to have a reliable cheese supply in case the fabric of space-time starts to unravel.

Cheddar: 5 blocks
Mozzarella: 3 bricks
Feta: 2 wheelbarrows full

Step 2: Secure Your Emotional Baggage

Don't get caught off guard by the impending collapse. Tie up loose ends, pay off outstanding debts, and apologize to that one friend you really shouldn't have borrowed money from in 2007.

Continue to Phase 3