Recipe for Tragedy

Ingredients: 1 cup of despair, 1/2 cup of desperation, 1/4 cup of hopelessness, and a pinch of regret.

1. Preheat oven to 400° F (or 200° of human suffering).
2. Mix ingredients in a bowl until you can't bear to look at it anymore.
3. Bake for 20-30 minutes, or until your hopes and dreams are reduced to ashes.
4. Serve with a side of existential dread.

Optional Desperation Sauce: Mix 1 tablespoon of tears with 2 tablespoons of regret. Stir until smooth.