I'm Dr. Pete, renowned expert on obscure topics and questionable life choices. I've lost my way in the world of academia, and I'm not quite sure how I got here.
My research on the art of Extreme Ironing has been met with both acclaim and ridicule. My book, "The Art of Ironing: A Guide to the Unlikely," is a bestseller in certain circles.
I'm currently seeking funding for my next project: "The Effects of Excessive Caffeine Consumption on the Human Brain." Wish me luck.
Or, if you're feeling adventurous, you could try to find me in the nearest coffee shop. I'm probably there, sipping on a latte.