TreeHuggerToby's Guide to the Most Useless Trees

Welcome, friend! I'm TreeHuggerToby, and I'm here to guide you through the world of the most useless trees for your feng shui needs.

The Ancient, Yet Useless, Pecan Tree

This tree has been standing for centuries, but its roots are shallow and its branches are sparse. It's the perfect addition to any feng shui arrangement that needs a 'I'm trying, but not really trying' vibe.

The Tree Of Doom: Where Your Feng Shui Goes To Die

This tree is a hazard waiting to happen. Its branches are a tangle of thorns, and its roots will suck the life out of any nearby plants. Perfect for that 'I'm a dark and troubled soul' aesthetic.

The Tree Of Solemnity: Where You'll Find Yourself Questioning Your Life Choices

This tree is a constant reminder that you're not as special as you thought. Its gnarled branches seem to mock you, its trunk is covered in moss that's seen better days, and its roots will make you wonder why you even bothered getting out of bed.