My Amazing Achievements:

Here are just a few of the countless reasons why I'm the Greatest Dad Ever:

Achieved a perfect score in 1987's "Pac-Man" at the county fair.
Won a pie-eating contest at the 4th of July BBQ.
Set the world record for most consecutive hours spent watching reruns of "I Love Lucy" (24 hours, 37 minutes, and 14 seconds).
Built a functional, if somewhat wobbly, rollercoaster in my backyard.

Check out some of my other incredible feats at:

Or, if you're feeling particularly brave, try: