Breaking News: Chaos Erupts in the Markets
We've got a real treat for you today, folks! Our intrepid reporters have managed to infiltrate the heavily fortified walls of the local market, and we've got the inside scoop on what's really going on.
It's official: the avocado toast is on fire, and it's spreading fast. Don't worry, though - our team of highly trained, highly caffeinated journalists is on the scene, capturing all the action in real-time.
But that's not all - we've also managed to score an exclusive interview with the infamous "Avocado Toast Kingpin," a shadowy figure rumored to be behind the chaos.
Need a primer on what's going on? Start with our Market Mayhem 101 guide!