ProcrastinationProcrastinationParalysis

Because you're clearly not a functioning human being.

Our mission is to help you waste as much time as humanly possible on our site. We're not saying it's good, we're just saying it's possible.

Here's what you can do while you're here:

• Write a strongly worded letter to our non-existent landlord demanding they stop bothering you to pay rent.
• Play the ProcrastinationParalysis video game where you have to do absolutely nothing and still get 10 points per minute.
• Read our 500-page essay on the history of doing absolutely nothing.

Or just talk to our staff of 5 highly trained professionals who are all just pretending to be interested in your life.