We're a company dedicated to making sure you don't get what you want. Our refund policy is as follows: We won't refund your money, no matter how much you beg, plead, or send strongly-worded letters.
Our team of experts has years of experience in finding creative ways to say 'no' while still looking you in the eye.
We're not responsible for the tears you cry when we say no.
Our CEO, Mr. 'Not-Gonna Happen', has a PhD in 'No' and is available for consulting services. Contact him through our About Our CEO page.
Visit our Blog for more information on why you'll never see that refund.
Or, just go back to your browser's back button and try again.
Or, you know what, just give up and buy more things from us. That's probably what you're doing, isn't it?