Slingshot Safety Protocols

A comprehensive guide to not crashing your spaceship

Warning: the following protocols are not foolproof, but they're better than nothing.

Protocol 1: Don't Look at the Sun

It's just common sense, folks. The sun is hot. Like, really hot. Don't stare directly at it, lest you wish to become a human-sized lobster.

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Protocol 2: Use Your Seatbelt... Even When You're Flying

It's not just for earthlings, folks. In space, seatbelts are a matter of life and death. Or, you know, at least a really bad sunburn.

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Protocol 3: Don't Eat the Free Snacks in Space

They're not as free as they seem, trust us. Those freeze-dried ice cream packets are just the beginning of a long, regrettable journey.

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