By: Professor Reginald P. Bottomsworth, Quantum Physics Whiz
It has been 4 hours since we last reported on the latest in quantum physics gone haywire. Today, it seems that someone has managed to create a singularity in the basement of 1313 Bizarro St. Witnesses report hearing the sound of 'Whooshing' coming from the vicinity, followed by an intense smell of 'Schrödinger's Catnip.'
Scientists are baffled as to how to contain the event horizon, which appears to be expanding at an alarming rate. 'It's like trying to put a square peg in a round hole,' said Dr. Emily P. Bottomsworth, a leading expert on quantum physics gone wrong.
For updates on this and other quantum physics gone wrong stories, be sure to check back with us tomorrow. In the meantime, try to contain your excitement.