Q: What are some examples of Unfair Punishments?
Our Unfair Punishments system is designed to be as arbitrary and capricious as possible. Here are a few examples:
- Forcing you to watch reruns of "The Great British Baking Show" for 24 hours straight.
- Making you eat an entire can of sardines while blindfolded.
- Forcing you to listen to elevator music in the middle of a thunderstorm.
Q: What are the criteria for Unfair Punishments?
Our Unfair Punishments algorithm takes into account your:
- Misuse of the word "sneak" in a sentence.
- Failure to wear matching socks to the office.
- Misuse of the phrase "break a leg" in an elevator, where someone is actually about to break their leg.
Q: Can I appeal my Unfair Punishment?
We're not really sure. Our lawyers are on the phone with our accountants, but we'll let you know when we get back to you.