Warning: The following content is not for the faint of heart. Or for anyone who likes to wear nice, comfortable clothing while diving. You've been warned.
A colossal squid with a bad attitude, a penchant for knock-knock jokes, and an unrelenting disdain for divers who wear neon green wetsuits, was spotted near the Kelp Forest, approximately 3.7 miles off the coast of Nowhere, Alaska.
If you're feeling particularly brave, try to catch a glimpse of the Colossal Squid at its next SquidFest event, but don't say we didn't tell you to bring a snorkel and a sense of humor.