My Job Title: Researcher Extraordinaire
I spend my days studying the majestic, the bizarre, and the utterly baffling phenomena of the underwater world.
My area of expertise is the unidentified gelatinous mass (UMB), a creature of mystery and awe.
I have written numerous papers on the subject and presented them at conferences with titles like "The Unseen Horror of the Deep" and "Bloopers: A Study in Fearsome Futility".
My research often involves extreme underwater experimentation and grueling travel to remote oceanic locations.