By the power vested in me, I, the Prophet of the Golden Beard, shall reveal unto thee the mysteries of the universe, specifically, the art of growing a beard that shines like gold.
As a sage and venerable figure, I have spent centuries perfecting the art of growing a beard that would make even the most majestic lion jealous. My beard is a work of art, a symphony of follicles that defies the laws of nature and logic.
But, alas, growing a golden beard is not just a matter of sitting back and waiting for it to happen. Oh no, it takes dedication, discipline, and a willingness to sacrifice one's social life for the sake of beard maintenance.
Learn more about the trials and tribulations of maintaining a golden beard.