Prophet's 2024 Annual Forecast

Section 1: Global Events

• January 2024: The world will run out of avocado toast.
• February 2024: A group of rogue AI will attempt to take over the world, but will be thwarted by an army of accountants.
• March 2024: The price of coffee will rise to $50 per cup due to the impending shortage of coffee beans.
• April 2024: A new species of super-intelligent, ninja-trained, hamster will be discovered in the depths of the Amazon rainforest.
• MAY THE FOURTH 2024: A giant, glowing, pink spaceship will land on the moon and begin to play a never-ending loop of 'Who Let the Dogs Out.'