Lobby Safety

Our Safety Features:

• Thick, impenetrable walls to block out the outside world.
• Emergency panic buttons that alert the janitor, who's always on call.
• A strict no-talking policy to ensure you don't get too worked up.
• A vending machine stocked with only the finest, most expensive coffee.

Lobby Safety Rules

Testimonials:

"I've been coming here for years and I've never had to worry about actually doing my job." - John D.

"The walls are so thick, I can finally relax and not have to think about my impending doom." - Jane Doe

See more testimonials

Our Safety Record:

No one has ever had a panic attack while in the lobby. Not. One. Single. Person.

We're so safe, you can even leave your laptop unattended and we'll still be here when you get back!

View our safety record