The Bacterial Bulldozer: a highly effective, highly unlikely, and utterly impractical method for grinding bacteria into submission. Developed by our team of expert bacterium- wranglers, the Bacterial Bulldozer is a behemoth of a machine that uses a combination of brute force and sheer terror to break down even the toughest bacterial cell walls.
Key features include:
- 10-foot long drill bit for maximum penetration
- High-torque motor for maximum grinding power
- Integrated bacterial- sorting system for efficient removal of byproducts
- Optional: built-in espresso machine for a much-needed caffeine boost during long grinding sessions
We are currently seeking funding for further research and development. If you'd like to support our efforts, please donate today!