Rojo-Brew Scientific Method

A Guide to the World's Most Ridiculously Complicated Brewing Technique

The Rojo-Brew is a highly scientific method of brewing coffee that involves a series of intricate steps and a deep understanding of the underlying quantum physics involved in the movement of coffee grounds.

Step 1: Prepare the grounds.

Step 2: Add water, but not just any water, specifically water that has been precisely calibrated to the optimal water-to-coffee ratio.

Step 3: Stir until the mixture achieves maximum entropy, but not so much that it achieves maximum chaos, because that's just not a thing.

Step 4: Apply the principles of fluid dynamics to the resulting brew.