Alice In Legal, Chief Legal Officer

Our Chief Legal Officer is a master of the law, but not really. She's actually a master of making really good excuses for why she's late to meetings. Her motto is "If you didn't write it down, it didn't happen, and even if it did, I'm not sure."

Background

Alice In Legal (A.I.L.) earned her Juris Doctorate in Law from the University of "Not-Quite-Straightforward" and has since worked as a corporate lawyer for several large companies. She has a proven track record of successfully arguing her way out of parking tickets, speeding tickets, and even one or two speeding tickets for her kids.

Alice In Legal is also an expert in the fields of:

• Lawyering the system
• Creating loopholes
• Telling her kids to "just go ahead and do it, I'm sure it's fine."

She's a member of the prestigious "Bar Association of the Unscrupulous" and has written several books on the subject of creative legal loopholes. She is a regular contributor to "The Legal Times" and has been a guest lecturer at the "School of Lawyering" several times.

Alice In Legal is available for hire for any occasion. If you need someone to get out of a speeding ticket, write a contract that's almost-but-not-quite-legal, or just need someone to tell you that everything will be okay, she's your person.

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