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As the daughter of a madman and the sister of a sociopath, Alice's early years were a blur of madness and mayhem. But don't worry, she's fine.
She grew up in a house with a door that led to nowhere, a garden full of talking flowers, and a kitchen where the cookies baked themselves.
It was a strange and wonderful time, full of wonder and curiosity. And, of course, a healthy dose of existential dread.
Want to see more? Visit our Siblings page for an in-depth look at her family dynamics.
Or, if you're feeling brave, head to Therapy to see how it all unraveled.
Warning: the truth is stranger than fiction.
Alice's Early Life: The Wonder Years
Age: 25 (in spirit)
Occupation: Time-traveling adventurer
Interests: Philosophy, baking, taxidermy