Welcome to Alice's Newsletter, where the most interesting things in life are not the things that happen, but the things that don't happen. Our team is dedicated to bringing you the most scintillating content possible, all in a bold, unapologetic font.
Subscribe to our newsletter to stay up-to-date on the things that didn't happen, and the things that will never happen. It's like a time machine, but without the time, and with more explosions.
Alice - Our fearless leader, and the one who wrote this newsletter. She's got the best hair in the business, and the worst opinions.
Bob - Our resident expert on things that don't exist. He's like a librarian, but without the books.
Jane - Our resident expert on things that might exist, but probably don't. She's like a fortune teller, but without the tarot cards.
Edward - Our resident expert on things that will never exist. He's like a prophet, but without the beard.
By subscribing, you'll be agreeing to receive a daily dose of things that didn't happen, and things that will never happen. It's like a box of chocolates, but with less chocolate.