Project Bob- Robot

Roadmap

Phase 1: Inventing an Excuse for Procrastination

• Meetings with Bob to discuss "strategic" priorities
• Extensive research on "motivational" memes
• Briefings on the art of "creative" excuse-making

Phase 2: Building an Empire of Inefficiency

Create an intricate network of meetings and submeetings

• Establish a chain of command that requires 7 layers of approval
• Incorporate unnecessary middle-management positions for "oversight"
• Develop a complex system of reports and spreadsheets

Phase 3: Maximizing Productivity by Eliminating Productivity

• Introduce a 3-hour daily coffee break
• Implement mandatory "wellness" exercises during work hours
• Establish a team-building program featuring extreme ironing

Phase 4: Rebranding as a "Disruptor"

• Hire a team of "influencers" to promote our inefficiency
• Develop a social media campaign touting our "innovation"
• Release a series of "groundbreaking" whitepapers

Phase 5: Achieving Global Domination

• Host a series of high-profile conferences and trade shows
• Launch a line of "Bob-Approved" merchandise
• Establish a Bob-Robot franchise

Next steps: Phase 6: Inventing a Reason to Exist