Interviewer (Samantha): Welcome to the most anticipated event of the century! Today, we're joined by the illustrious Bob Sr., patriarch of the esteemed "Book of Disappointment" series.

"I'm not sure how much more disappointment I can take," says Bob Sr., sipping on a lukewarm cup of coffee.

Q: Your series has been widely panned by critics and readers alike. How do you respond to the backlash?

A: Ah, the haters just don't understand genius, Samantha. My books are a reflection of the crushing despair that is modern life. I'm like the literary equivalent of a punch in the gut, a wake-up call to the apathetic masses.

Q: Your son, Bob Jr., has been vocal about his disappointment in your work. Do you have any response to that?

A: Oh, that little scamp. He just doesn't get it. He thinks art should be pretty and pleasant, like one of his silly memes. But I'm a visionary, Samantha. I'm a trailblazer.

Read Roth Sr.'s scathing rebuttal to Bob Jr.'s criticism Check out Bob Sr.'s unfiltered advice to his readers