Steve's Expert Guide to Late-Night Snacking
By Jen, Chief Snacking Officer and Supreme Overlord of the Night
It's 3 AM. You're up. You're bored. And, let's be real, you're probably eating Cheetos. But why settle for just any snack? No, no. You deserve better. Steve's got you covered.
Step 1: Gather Your Essential Snacking Tools
- A bag of Cheetos, but only the Flaming Hot kind. The rest of you are basic.
- A can of spray cheese. Don't judge.
- A pack of ramen noodles. The instant kind, because who needs flavor?
- A can of sardines. It's like a party in your mouth!
Step 2: Execute the Snacking Plan
- Inhale a Cheeto, then immediately regret it. Repeat as necessary.
- Spray cheese all over a sad, wilted lettuce. It's a masterpiece.
- Nuke the ramen noodles with a generous helping of nuclear hot sauce. Your taste buds will thank you (or cry, we can't promise).
- Drain the sardine can into a Cheeto-filled Cheeto can. The perfect snackin' circle of life.
And there you have it, folks! A snacking experience so transcendent, so divine, that you'll be the envy of all your friends. Or not. Maybe just stick to Netflix.
Stephanie's Late-Night Snacking Subpage for the Adventurous Steve's Even Late-Night Snacking Guide for the Truly Insane