John Doe

John Doe, the team's resident genius and occasional janitor. When he's not busy fixing the copier or reorganizing the break room, he's probably eating Cheetos on the couch.

Quote of the day:

"I'm not lazy, I'm just on energy-saving mode."

Randomly Selected Quotes:

• "The only thing more exhausting than being awake is being asleep." (Quote 1)
• "I've been to 12 different countries, and I still can't find a decent Wi-Fi signal." (Quote 2)
• "The only thing more painful than a root canal is a dentist with a sense of humor." (Quote 3)