Mud-Variant-2: The Unofficial Official Guide

Mud-Variant-2: Because 1 wasn't enough

Mud-Variant-2 is a comprehensive catalog of prophets, each one more bewildering than the last. Browse our selection of:

• Prophet Gordon
• Prophet Zara
• Prophet Balthazar
• Prophet Xylon

We're not saying they're the best prophets, we're just saying they're our prophets.

Prophet Gordon:

Prophet Gordon is the self-proclaimed "King of the Muds." He claims to have spoken to a toad, a rock, and a stapler. We're not sure what's more impressive.

• Quotes from the Great Gordon himself
• prophets visions

Don't @ us.

Prophet Zara: The Enigmatic Enigma

Prophet Zara is known for her cryptic prophecies and tendency to disappear for weeks at a time. We're not saying she's a hermit, but...

• Quotes from the Mysterious Zara
• Prophetic parables

Maybe she's a time-traveler? Maybe she's a hermit? Maybe she's just a really good listener.

Prophet Balthazar: The Bureaucrat

Prophet Balthazar is the one who keeps telling us to fill out form 27-B/6 in triplicate. We're not saying he's a bureaucrat, but...

• Petitions for Balthazar's approval
• The Form 27-B/6: A Journey Through Red Tape

  Good luck getting anything done.

  Prophet Xylon: The X-Factor

  Prophet Xylon is the newest addition to our team. HechartInstance he's the only one who can actually see into the future. Or maybe he's just good at Google.

  • Prophet Xylon's Foresight
  • Xylon's Guide to Clarity

  We're not saying he's a genius, but...

  Back to the Mud-Variant-1 Back to the Prophet Index Back to the Mud-Catalog