At Bloat Industries, we're not just about building software that does one thing well. Oh no. We're about building software that does a million things moderately well.
We're proud to say that our feature list has grown longer than a middle-aged accountant's beard.
Our engineers are trained to add features with reckless abandon, like a drunk person throwing darts at a board.
We believe that a feature is never finished, and neither is a pizza. That's why we add features until they're as big as a house.
Our users will love us for it, or they'll hate us for it, but at least we'll be talking about it for years to come.