The Most Elaborate Doomsday Cake Recipes Known To ManPlan Your Global Takeover

The Secret Ingredient

• 1 cup of nuclear-grade radioactive material
• 3 cups of pure, unrefined chaos
• 2 cups of existential dread

Instructions

1. Mix the radioactive material with the pure, unrefined chaos in a large, lead-lined mixing bowl.
2. Add the existential dread, stirring counterclockwise until the mixture reaches a state of maximum anxiety.
3. Pour the mixture into a well-oiled, high-temperature oven and bake for precisely 4 minutes and 22 seconds.