By order of the Ministry of Sleep Deprivation, I, John, hereby declare the following:
That I will be taking a nap of epic proportions at 15:00 hours sharp.
That said nap will last for precisely 37.5 minutes, no more, no less.
That all work and responsibilities will be suspended during this time.
That I will not be disturbed under any circumstances, including but not limited to:
- Urgent meetings
- Sales calls
- Family members' nagging
That failure to comply will result in severe penalties, including but not limited to:
- Loss of coffee privileges
- Temporary transfer to the dreaded Cube of Shame
- Revocation of all snacks