John's Naptime Protocol is a comprehensive guide for optimal napping techniques. It's a 5-phase program designed to help you achieve the perfect balance between rest and productivity.
Phase 1: Denial - Refuse to admit you need a nap. Claim you're fine. Deny, deny, deny!
Phase 2: Acceptance - Acknowledge your need for a nap. Start to accept that it's okay to take a break. It's okay, it's okay, it's okay!
Phase 3: Recovery - Take a short nap. 15-30 minutes. Just 15-30 minutes, I swear!
Phase 4: Relapse - Realize you've overslept. Panic. Oh no, I'm late! I'm late!
Phase 5: Enlightenment - Understand that napping is not a sin. It's a necessary evil. Sin? Evil? More like... Genius!
Remember, the goal of John's Naptime Protocol is to nap wisely. Nap on, John, Nap on!