Techno-Tard's Tech Support: Withdrawal Treatment Protocol

You're a slave to the system, but the system is a slave to us.

Our experts are here to help you navigate the digital detox, one pixel at a time.

Current Status: Withdrawal Phase 3: The Dark Ages

We'll provide you with:

• 24/7 access to our team of highly trained, slightly-caffeinated technicians
• A comprehensive analysis of your system's deepest, darkest secrets
• A personalized treatment plan tailored to your unique brand of techno- addiction

Phase 1: The Agony of Withdrawal | Phase 2: The Desperation of Desperation | Phase 3: The Dark Ages (You Are Here) | Phase 4: The Enlightenment of Despair