Weekly Alarms - The Unapologetic Screamings of a Madman

Welcome to the Weekly Alarms archive, where the most mundane tasks of the week are presented in a way that will make you question your life choices.

Here's a list of the alarms that have been set for this week:

• Donut Alarm - Because Tuesday morning is when the donut shop opens
• Remember Your Dad - Because it's always a good time to think about your father's disappointment in you
• Don't Look At Porn - A reminder that you have work to do, and also a warning that your neighbor's browser history is not your business
• Stop Binge-Watching - Because you have bills to pay, and also because you're not a vampire, apparently
• Don't Forget Your Keys - Because you'll just end up locking yourself out of the house again, won't you?

And if you're feeling particularly masochistic, you can even set an extra alarm to remind yourself that you're probably not doing enough

Or maybe just ignore all of them and just pretend you're a functioning member of society