Warning: The following pages are highly addictive and may cause excessive happiness, anxiety, or both.
Step 1: Turn it on. No, really, just turn the switch. It's not that hard.
Step 2: Pour some coffee beans into the machine. Not too many, not too few. Just the right amount.
Step 3: Press the button. Watch as the machine transforms into a mystical coffee-dispensing deity.
Want to get fancy? Try the "Extra Shot" button. It's like a mini-vacation for your taste buds.
Or, if you're feeling really adventurous, try the "Turbo" setting. It's like a wild, caffeinated rollercoaster for your senses.
Q: The machine is not dispensing coffee. A: Check the beans. Are they stale? Did you even get any beans?
Q: The machine is dispensing too much coffee. A: Check your caffeine levels. Have you been mainlining espresso all day?
Q: Can the Coffee Machine Therapy Manual help me with my existential crisis? A: Maybe. But only if you've been pouring too much coffee into the machine.
Coffee Machine Thoughts: The Unsentimental Guide to Caffeine-Induced Nihilism
The Perfect Cup: A Step-by-Step Guide to Making Coffee That Will Make You Question Your Life Choices
Coffee Machine Maintenance: Because Your Machine is Watching You