Why We Can't Fire John

Because John is a union rep, and union reps are the bane of management's existence.

They're like a bad rash that just won't go away, no matter how hard you scrub.

• Union reps have the union cards
• Departmental Union Reps are a Bad Idea

John is like a ticking time bomb, waiting to unleash a barrage of grievances and union rules upon us all.

We've tried to fire him before, but the union has always managed to talk us out of it.

So, we're just going to have to deal with John and his union reps until the end of time.

Or until he gets a raise.

And even then, we'll probably just have to give him a promotion.

Because, you know, union reps are like the ultimate trump card.