Why did the coffee file a police report?
It was a grind.
I'm reading a book about antelope.
It's a real page-turner.
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems.
What do you call a group of cats playing instruments?
A mew-sical band.
Why did the bicycle fall over?
Because it was two-tired.
What do you call a can opener that's an atheist?
An open atheist.