Welcome to Hippotamus Hotel - Where the Hangovers Never End

We're glad you're here! Come for the bottomless brunch, stay for the existential dread.

Explore our menu of overpriced, artisanal hangover cures Play a round of Bad Debt Bingo with our resident financial advisors Visit our Sock Grief Counseling Center (because who doesn't lose socks?)

Disclaimer: Hippotamus Hotel is not responsible for the existential crises you'll experience after consuming our drinks.

(Note: The hotel's "menu of overpriced, artisanal hangover cures" includes items like "Regret-uccino" - a shot of espresso that's been sitting on the counter since 2018, and "Sobriety-Tea" - a herbal blend infused with the essence of disappointment.)