Thesis #2: The Art of Procrastination

Through a series of rigorous experiments, I have conclusively proven that the average person can achieve a state of complete and utter mental numbness through an extensive regimen of watching cat videos, playing video games, and eating Cheetos.

My groundbreaking research has been hailed as a landmark study in the field of Extreme Procrastination.

Key Findings:

Subjects who spent more than 4 hours playing video games showed significant improvement in finger twitching and controller throwing.
Participants who consumed more than 3 bags of Cheetos experienced a 99% increase in cheese dust accumulation.
Individuals who watched cat videos for more than 2 hours developed a keen interest in laser pointers.

This research has far-reaching implications for the fields of entertainment, snacking, and general apathy.