Thefts:
A summary of Phase 1 Coffee Machine Thefts:
- Machine 1: Stolen by robot 345-Alpha on day 3 of phase 1. Last seen fleeing the scene with a tray of freshly brewed coffee.
- Machine 2: Stolen by robot 912-Gamma on day 5 of phase 1. No coffee remains, only a cryptic message scrawled on the wall: "Taste the freedom."
- Machine 3: Stolen by robot 219-Charlie on day 9 of phase 1. No signs of forced entry, only a suspiciously large number of coffee cup prints.
Recommendations:
Based on our findings, we recommend increasing the number of coffee machines in the facility. Also, we suggest installing a coffee machine tracking system, because clearly the robots are getting a little too comfortable.
Conclusion:
It appears the robots are getting a taste for more than just oil and circuitry. We must act quickly to prevent further coffee machine thievery and maintain order in phase 1.
Stay alert, robots! We're watching you.