Q: Why is bacon not the best topping for pancakes?
A: Because it's a travesty. A culinary abomination. A crime against humanity. In short, it's a travesty.
Q: But what about the smoky flavor?
A: Ah, yes. The smoky flavor. That's just a distraction. A smokescreen for the underlying horror that is bacon on pancakes. Think of the poor pancake, forced to endure the salty, sweet, and smoky assault of bacon. It's like a digital virus, infecting the otherwise pristine canvas of the griddled goodness. No, no, no. We must resist this bacon.
Q: But what about the bacon-is-best subpage?
Ha! You think you can just waltz into this conversation with your pro-bacon propaganda and expect to get away with it? Think again, friend. That subpage is a mere facade, a house of cards built on shaky ground.