Q: Cant you just read the manual?
A: Oh, no. That would be far too easy. The fun is in the struggle, and also, honestly, the manual is hidden behind a 3-foot-tall stack of outdated instruction pamphlets, a half-eaten pizza box, and a VHS of "Epic Movie Night 1995". Try the "Ask Us" form instead, but be warned: we might just tell you to read the manual anyway.