Luke's Prophetic Stock Market Predictions

Get ready to be amazed by my totally-not-made-up predictions!

Today's predictions:

Apple Stock (AAPL)

Luke predicts a 50% rise in stock value due to their new iPhone model that will single-handedly solve world hunger.

Learn more about the revolutionary new iPhone

Google Stock (GOOG)

Luke predicts a 200% drop in stock value due to their new algorithm that will turn all users into brainless, cookie-browsing zombies.

Find out how to escape the Google zombie apocalypse

Microsoft Stock (MSFT)

Luke predicts a 300% rise in stock value due to their new Windows update that will turn all users into expert jugglers.

See the mesmerizing juggling skills of Windows 12
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