The Bottomsworth Method

Methodology

The Bottomsworth Method is a rigorous, no-nonsense approach to judging awards shows. It's all about finding the perfect blend of style, substance, and utter disdain for the human spirit.

Step 1: Scourge the contestants for their lack of originality.

Step 2: Subjectively decide who looks the most like a winner.

Step 3: Award the winner a prize that's slightly less terrible than the others.

Step 4: Repeat steps 1-3 until the end of the awards show.

Learn more about Step 1: Scourge the contestants Learn more about Step 2: Subjectively decide who looks the most like a winner

Notable Mentions

• The time we gave a participation trophy to a contestant who didn't even show up.
• The year we awarded a prize to a category with no actual entries.
• The infamous "Most Likely to Succeed" award given to a contestant who had already dropped out of the competition.

Read more about our most notable mistakes