Causes of Constipation in 1986
- Excessive consumption of Taco Bell's new 'Baja Blasts'
- Avoiding the gym due to fear of spandex-clad aerobics instructors
- Reading the entirety of "The Joy of Painting" by Bob Ross in one sitting
Symptoms of Constipation in 1986
- Feeling like you've been sitting on a rock for an eternity
- Inability to recall what year it is or what day of the week it is
- Uncontrollable urges to watch reruns of "The Dukes of Hazzard" on TV
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