Sleepytime

Essentials

Because adulting is hard, but sleep is optional.

1. Set your alarm for 4 AM, just to be safe.

2. Wear your PJs to bed. It's the most efficient way to save time on getting dressed in the morning.

3. Use a pillow fort. They're like normal pillows, but better.

4. Sleep with your pet. They won't bother you, and you can pretend they're the kids.

5. Don't bother setting an alarm. Sleep is a right, not a privilege.

6. Take a 4 AM coffee break. It's like a power nap, but with caffeine.

7. Use a sleep mask. It's like a blindfold, but for your eyes.

8. Sleep with your phone. It's like a tiny, glowing alarm clock that you can stare at all night.

Because why settle for regular sleeping when you can sleep with the added stress of drowning.

Underwater sleeping is the new sleep trend, and it's not just for seals and otters no more!

Here's why:

1. You'll never wake up to an 8 AM alarm call. Ever.
2. Your bed is basically just a giant waterbed, but with fish food.
3. You'll never have to deal with annoying bedbugs. They'll just be called 'sharks'.
4. And finally, you can just pretend you're a dolphin when you sleep.

1. Don't try to hold your breath. It'll just make things worse.

2. Use a snorkel. It's like a straw, but better.

3. Don't sleep with your eyes open. It's just rude.

4. Try to sleep with your ears closed. It's not like you're going to need them or anything.

5. Don't sleep with your mouth open. It's just not done.

6. Try to sleep with your eyes closed. It's just a matter of time.